'Gaduh' yang aku maksudkan kat sini bukan physical attack ya. Gaduh mulut je.
Sejujurnya, aku tak nampak kat mana logiknya statement di atas.
Pergaduhan tak pernah menyenangkan. Pergaduhan selalunya mengeruhkan lagi perhubungan. Rumahtangga berantakan kerana pergaduhan walaupun sekecil kuman!
Secara logiknya bila kita bergaduh, kita meluahkan segala apa yang terbuku di hati. Secara tak langsung, kita kurangkan beban di dada yang menyesakkan. Namun tak semua yang kita katakan dapat diterima dengan baik. Selalunya ia disalah ertikan atau pun dibolak-balikkan menjadi sesuatu yang bertentangan dari maksud sebenar. Maklumlah tengah gaduh, darah panas, otak tak mampu nak merasionalkan. Acapkali kita lantas membalas tanpa memahami dan mendalami apa yang ingin disampaikan oleh pasangan. Semangat 'nak menang' tu memang berkobar-kobar, lantas mengetepikan semangat 'mari berdamai'.
Tapi ada juga kes yang lepas gaduh je mengandung, gaduh je mengandung. Tang tu aku taknak komen. Lain orang lain kandungan hormon.
So kat bawah aku copy paste nasihat yang berguna untuk semua. Pada yang belum kahwin, please take this seriously. Pada yang belum kahwin, hmmm..tak dapek den nak nolong.
I personally like #1. Nailed it!
36 Invaluable Pieces Of Relationship Advice
We learned the hard way so you don’t have to.
posted on Feb. 1, 2015, at 10:39 p.m.
Alice Mongkongllite / BuzzFeed
Their responses ran the gamut from funny to sappy, from downright silly to totally practical, so it’s only fair that we share their nuggets of wisdom with you:
1. “Admit when you’re wrong, shut up when you’re right.”
—submitted by Johnny Storm
2. “Date someone for a year before taking the next step, whether that be moving in together or getting engaged. People change with the seasons.”
—submitted by Tawny Elle Easterling
3. “There are two boxes in every relationship: hope and expectation.”
“Resentment builds when you put petty things into the expectation box (he needs to give me flowers, he needs to take me places, etc.). Put petty things in the hope box and be clear about what is in your expectation box.”
—submitted by Amber Malin
5. “My dad told me: Don’t be interesting. Be interested. Actually listen to her. It’s by far the best thing you can do. You’d be surprised how many men don’t know this.”
—submitted by David Kasunick
6. “You are not in a movie, you are a real person — don’t expect other people to treat you like you’re always the star.”
—submitted by Alex Lisette
7. “Don’t fight about money because after you’ve fought and maybe said mean things to each other, the amount of money in the bank will be the same. “
—submitted by Shauna Durham
8. “Have separate checking accounts!”
“A couple should have a joint account for all household bills, but they should have their own accounts for personal expenses. As long as all the bills are paid and some money is going into a savings account, they should each have a little money to spend as they please.”
—submitted by John Thomas
10. “My father told me to look how my significant other interacts with other people, especially waiters and servers, while in the getting-to-know-each-other stages. He said it’s the best way to see a person’s true colors.”
—submitted by Roisin Kilroy
11. “Don’t marry someone you don’t want your children to be.”
—submitted by lucyc42c8b3828
12. “Once someone told me: ‘Put your finger in your partner’s nose. If it disgusts you, it means you’re not in love.’”
—submitted by Dinora Agathe Kruja
13. “Keep the fights clean and the sex dirty.”
—submitted by Becky Hobbs Haler
14. “Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.”
—submitted by Courtney Danielle
15. “The best advice I’ve ever got was from my mum: ‘Everyone is at some point an asshole — it’s about finding an asshole you can put up with.’”
—submitted by sophies4da1cd301
16. “Choose your in-laws wisely!”
—submitted by esny528
17. “My mom once sat me down and very seriously told me: ‘The first few years of your relationship should be incredible.’”
“‘Not to say that you won’t fight, but you should not be fighting all the damn time. If your partner is upsetting you this much now, imagine what it is going to be like a marriage, two kids, and several years from now. Take your time: People’s tastes change, and it is much easier to throw out a couch than a husband.’”
—submitted by Meghan Elizabeth
19. “If your boyfriend is always making you cry, you have to ask yourself: Is he your boyfriend or is he an onion?”
—submitted by jodies4f46d2bf7
20. “Remember, your spouse will still be there after your kids are gone.”
—submitted by Catie Hurley
—submitted by Catie Hurley
21. “If you’re upset about something that won’t matter in five years, you should not be upset about it.”
—submitted by Kady Kidd
22. “Definitely go to bed mad. Everyone is an asshole when they’re tired and cranky. Find your perspective and your compassion tomorrow morning and then resume.”
—submitted by Melissa De Lory
23. “Always kiss after an argument.”
“Doesn’t have to be a big kiss, just a peck. It signifies the argument is over, you’re moving on, and you still love and appreciate your partner.”
—submitted by courtneyd10
24. “When you disagree, stick to the issue at hand. Don’t drag up old fights, old flames, or old issues.”
—submitted by laurenc21
25. “The best advice I ever got was from my grandmother. I asked her if she and my grandfather were still in love after all these years. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘We can argue about the little things because we agree on all of the big things.’”
—submitted by Casey Cooke
26. “Always sleep in the same bed, no matter how angry.”
—submitted by Stephanie West
27. “How do you know when it’s over? When you feel more in love with your memories than with the person in front of you.”
—submitted by Chelsg
28. “Thank them for everything, even for the little things they do.”
“Saying ‘Thank you for emptying the dishwasher’ isn’t just about the dishes — it says ‘I notice you, I recognize that you work to make our home better, I value your efforts enough to call them out, and I do not take those same efforts for granted.’ No one will ever get tired of being thanked, and at the same time it fosters an atmosphere of gratitude in the home — you may find yourself being thanked more often in return.”
—submitted by Jess Ballinger
“Saying ‘Thank you for emptying the dishwasher’ isn’t just about the dishes — it says ‘I notice you, I recognize that you work to make our home better, I value your efforts enough to call them out, and I do not take those same efforts for granted.’ No one will ever get tired of being thanked, and at the same time it fosters an atmosphere of gratitude in the home — you may find yourself being thanked more often in return.”
—submitted by Jess Ballinger
29. “Remember that the way you want to be loved is not always the same way that your partner does.”
—submitted by Amanda Hogan
31. “Talk to each other. Talk about silly things, about serious topics, about anything and everything under the sun.”
—submitted by Arlene B. Nuestro
32. “My twin brother and his husband are the best. Husbands. Ever.”
“I watch them. Twin Bro is in medical school, Hubby is getting a Ph.D., so they’re super busy all the time. They have study dates at the library. They have a cleaning service come in once a month because a clean house is more relaxing than a dirty one. They talk about their feelings all the time. They ask for what they need. They changed their furniture — went from a couch and recliner to a sectional — so they’d be more likely to snuggle with each other since they know that’s important.”
—submitted by Jennifer Nelson
33. “My mom told me once that the secret of marriage is not to commit to someone for the rest of your life — it’s to commit to trying 100% every day.”
—submitted by katys4deff4ddd
34. “From my grandma: ‘Always remember the beginning.’”
—submitted by abigaillundt
35. “Fight like you’re both siblings, tend and tidy like parents, challenge ideas like strangers, laugh like best friends, and love and forgive like long-lost partners.”
—submitted by Dea Cothran
36.
Alice Mongkongllite / BuzzFeed
